It’s a trend always on the rise – the need to be the best, the smartest, the fastest, the wealthiest, the most popular… The need for speed will never stop. But, that doesn’t mean all of us are jumping on the first flight out to a land of discontentment and many times unachievable desires. Maybe you’ve been a passenger of the speed train for a long time and are ready to disembark – do we even remember how to not be bombarded by feelings of “not being good enough” in a world that tells us we aren’t good until we’re great?
I spent many years trying to prove myself to other people. I touched on this in my last post The Importance of Being Independent but I was always the “I can do it and I don’t need your help” person. And, a lot of that is still in me and probably always will be. A lot of that links back to things I cannot control, but have impacted my person and my outlook. The idea of being dependent on anyone is crippling at times. I’ve consistently carried at least three jobs but at times up to six. The need to be productive, to be busy, to be helpful, to be independent, to give back, to not be a burden, to make my own way… these things will never going away because they are inherently ingrained into my DNA. But, the need to “outdo” everyone else I know… to have the most fantastic job, to have the best car, to one up them… that is where somehow our world has gone from the morals of making your own way and having an honest day’s work to one of entitlement and expectation and the constant drive to be better than everyone else.
Instead of encouraging people to be content with having a job they enjoy or finding joy in living day to day, society and those around us feed us toxic thoughts that if we don’t “have it all together” or have our “dream job” or aren’t banking six figures by the time we’re 25 then we are never going to amount to anything. We’re worthless, we’re the duds, we’re the ugly duckling in a group of swans. It seems extreme, but it’s reality and I see it all around me. We live to work not work to live. We expect to be given everything instead of working towards a goal. My goals are not your goals. Your goals are your own and no one, ever, should make you feel that they are less than what they are. Maybe you are content doing what you are doing and being where you are for now but those around you infiltrate your happiness with questions and cause you to be uncertain. Let me tell you this – you cannot put a price on contentment. Period.
The world and people around you who do not hold your best interest at heart should never be the barometer for your life. You will never be good enough for them because as soon as you get that high paying job, they are going to start asking you when you will fulfill the next expected step on the ladder of success. The people around us who belong in our lives will push us forward in our goals, in our dreams, and help stretch us when it is time to be pulled in a new direction. But, the pushing and shoving that comes with climbing over each other to reach the top is a one way ticket to self destruction and self hate.
If you wanna be fast, enjoy the ride and soak up every opportunity. But, also find contentment in being a well rounded, complete human being who finds beauty and worth in the smallest details of where your life is existing at this moment.
